var msgs = new Array(
"better than a blow to the head.",
"we think we hear your mom calling.",
"what are you staring at, tough guy?",
"part of this complete breakfast.",
"what are you, in middle school?",
"a Complete Waste of Bandwidth (R) Company",
"bringing the end a little bit nearer.",
"we're you're ticket out of here.",
"buzzword compliant.",
"keeping white text in style.",
"makes surfing the web take longer.",
"65% fat free.",
"okay, actually 23% fat free.",
"building tommorrow's legacy systems, today.",
"where did we leave our car keys?",
"what is that on your face?",
"did you eat the last cookie?",
"we should be ashamed of ourselves.",
"more pixels than the next leading brand.",
"ask about our enterprise edition.",
"realize more cost savings immediately.",
"12 locations to serve you.",
"bringing you the freshest.",
"fish are our friends.  not food.",
"helps build bones 8 ways.",
"this is just a phase.  it will blow over.",
"take your filthy portlets and go.",
"we like cheese.",
"bits for sale, cheap.",
"dilligently testing video games since 1987.",
"is it time to buy a new phone yet?",
"we can't feel our toes.",
"we hate chickens.",
"try new teriyaki style.",
"you have died of dysentery.",
"today is a cotton day.",
"keeps your coat healthy and shiny.",
"shipping products at some time.  maybe.",
"we gave our gun a name.  A girl's name.",
"phoning it in since 1994.",
"flawless victory.",
"that's not funny, don't even say that.",
"now with 20% more.",
"it's definitely time to throw those away.",
"we help fight cavities.",
"don't look at us like that.",
"return the product for a full refund.",
"pretend this is a banner ad.",
"your lucky numbers are 17, 21, 42.",
"a major source of noise pollution.",
"what should you be doing instead of this?",
"fishing for a compliment.",
"please just have a seat in the corner.",
"we're not convinced by charts and graphs.",
"we want ice cream.",
"high-availability pointlessness.",
"kills plants dead.",
"now with more flavour.  british flavour.",
"boldly going where no one has, you know, whatever.",
"do we have something in our teeth?",
"a more efficient way to shop.",
"mushrooms cause cancer.",
"enhancing your experience since 1995.",
"are you even listening to me?",
"now with Total Whitening.",
"quality framing and bleeding services.",
"mocking the plight of others since 2003.",
"smiling wastes energy.",
"are you sick of sunsets yet?",
"perfect for the carb counter.",
"wherever there's trouble, we are there.",
"we're stealing your porn.  It was us all along.",
"squinting at you uncomprehendingly since 1977.",
"we're beatrice.",
"we are getting too old for this.",
"tables hold things up.  tables are good.",
"your feet smell.",
"turning it up to 11.",
"are you wearing that again today?",
"we were not speeding.  we swear.",
"do you smell that?  that can't be good."
);


// show a new message every minute
var td = document.getElementById("welcomeMessage");
var theTime = parseInt((new Date()).getTime()/60000);
td.innerHTML = msgs[theTime%msgs.length];
